Part way through teaching myself to draw like Michelangelo, I decided that next I’d be teaching myself Procreate!

If you’re not familiar, it’s an app for creating digital art on an iPad.

I guess I was on a roll with the audacity of teaching myself to draw like Michelangelo by just doing it. I didn’t take any classes, or watch any YouTube videos. I just got books from the library for reference and jumped in.

Are there better ways of doing this? Probably.

There are many classes and instructions out in the world, for pretty much anything you want to learn. And if you are inclined, and able to, by all means take them.

I myself have a long career in corporate learning and development, where the necessity is programs, curricula, courses, lessons, quizzes, etc. A lot of structure, a lot of control. My choosing this path was certainly audacious.

AND I wanted to find the value in fucking around and finding out.

This is how I went about teaching myself Procreate.

I got an iPad on a Black Friday deal and used an old gift card to offset the purchase of an Apple pencil. In general, if you can avoid paying full price for something like this, do it!

As I was still in my Michelangelo phase, my first drawings were from the books I had open.

First try was a hand. I had no idea what I was doing but it turned out well.

A hand bent gently at the wrist, my first try at teaching myself Procreate.

There’s an option for pastels in Procreate, thought I’d try it out. Not a bad outcome.

A digital pastel drawing of a seated nude woman reaching one arm upwards. This is Eve reaching for the forbidden apple. — Eve from The Temptation and Expulsion, by Michelangelo.

The interesting thing about learning a new skill, or a new material, is how often you get stuck.

I got this far on this drawing of Adam and could go no further. I wanted to deepen shadows and do something with the hair, but I was stuck.
So stuck.

A digital drawing of a nude, reclining man. So reclined, that he is slumped over, in fact. This is Adam, asleep after God has removed his rib to create Eve. — Adam, from the Creation of Eve, by Michelangelo.

So I called it done and moved on.

I knew I ultimately wanted to work on portraits, so I decided I’d better get started.

A series of 4 brightly coloured portraits of women. A clear progression is visible from the first one, which is quite rough, to the last one, which is more refined and recognizable.

My first attempts were not beautiful to look at.
I feature them here because I want to show you evidence that learning a new thing means bad and mediocre work must happen.

More than being ok, it’s a requirement.
And it must keep on happening in order for you to get better.

I thought I’d keep playing with pastels. I pushed at this image, did it and redid it several times. Pushed here, and pushed there.
Eventually I realized I was stuck right here. I decided to let it be.
I don’t usually work in pastels IRL, it’s ok if I don’t work in digital pastels too.

A digital pastel drawing of a woman on a black background. The woman is not identifiable outside of wearing a pink dress and having blue hair.

Had I taken a course or something with more structure than me just fucking around, I would NOT have been ok with being stuck. I would have felt obligated to finish the lesson. And I would have felt obligated to finish it well. Knowing that I was just playing around gave me the space to make bad art. It gave me the space to say, “well, I’m stuck. Time to move on.”

Having passed on pastels, it was time to try paint!

This is from one of the Michelangelo books I had open. Definitely an improvement over the last effort. A face is recognizable, some blending has happened.
And once again, stuck as stuck could be.
I knew this was unfinished. I knew it needed more light and shadow, more blending, more details.
But. I. Could. Not. Make. It. Happen.

A digital painting of the head of a woman on a peach background. The painting is in shades of green and yellow, and is very rough.

So I called it done and tried another one.

This, friend, is a self-portrait.
No, I don’t really look like this.
But I’m definitely getting better at Procreate!
I’m getting further along with colour, with light and dark, with form and blending.

A digital painting of a brown woman on a purple background. The painting is more refined, but the features are rather...rubbery.

Here is the first digital painting I made that I’m satisfied with.
Is there room for improvement? 100%.
But she is so great just as she is!

A digital painting in shades of blue. A woman with long, flowing black hair holds a blue orb in both hands and presents it to the viewer. She has bare branches radiating around her head, and her eyes are golden. There is a halo of lighter blue around her head, which darkens into black towards the edges of the painting. — Winter’s Dark

Possibly it helped that I had a story to tell with her. All the other pieces were straight practice with no backstory.

This painting is called Winter’s Dark. It was made for the winter solstice (Yule). She is a personification of the time of year: The solstice means light and warmth have begun their journey back to us, although the waiting will be long and cold. The kind look on her face reminds us this is not a terrible season, now is the time for rest and reflection.
The branches in her hair remind us that life and leaves will return.
But for now, rest.

What’s the summary here?

I’ve spent most of my life wanting to hide the bad and mediocre work I’ve made. And I’ve made plenty!

I would only show people the really good pieces. I was embarrassed about the other stuff. I didn’t even want to admit it was there!
This was not helped by our culture which idolizes perfect and beautiful things, and neglects to show the messy path of how they came to be.

Now I understand how important the other stuff is.

Now I want other people to see the messy path, so they know it’s ok to be messy, to be mediocre.
It’s ok to be stuck, and it’s ok to move on.

No need to waste energy being embarrassed. Spend that energy celebrating your progress!

Follow me on Instagram to see more of my journey to learn Procreate!