Brief Surge

Most of the time, I’ve felt I had to do this thing, or that work, or [insert responsible activity here]. Truly, if you’d asked me (at any point in my adult life) what I wanted to do, the answer would probably be something like go back to bed; or eat pizza and then go back to bed. But, because I really, really want to be a responsible adult, I don’t do those things outside of socially permissible timeframes. Instead I make myself do the things I think responsible adults have to do.

This painting is a glimpse of the other side. A fleeting sensation of a surge of…energy? motivation? confidence? willingness? to do a thing I want to do, that I feel is bigger than me (or pizza). For a brief moment it felt like my heart was lifted and, if I put my hands and mind to the task, it would happen without effort.

Of course I didn’t do the thing. I made the painting and then wrote this. BUT! What an exciting thing to experience nonetheless.